Open-mindedness: More about lifestyle

I first wanted the second text in our open-mindedness project to be about the many different ways of being open-minded, to show how many aspects of life this topic plays an important role in. However, the more I think about it, the longer the list grows. So, to give it time to reach near-full length, and still keep this project flowing, I built a little on what Hanna wrote in her introduction. This text will also be available in her blog: A Little Blog About Words.

Hanna already explained what we mean by being open-minded in the introductory post. An open-minded person is someone who is willing to consider and appreciate other lifestyles than his/her own. There is no requirement to let them influence your own life; but you ought to accept and respect the choices other people have made in their lives without passing hasty judgement.

Among our friends and acquaintances, Hanna and I have noticed that several people blindly consider their own lifestyle and/or world view to be the correct one. Some may be aware of this mindless conviction, others may just hold that belief subconsciously. We can find it rather irritating to have a conversation about important life questions if every idea we utter seems to shatter into dust against the solid wall that is the mind of our peer.

However, that is not the reason Hanna and I feel so strongly about this project. We feel sorry for them, really. We believe that their stubbornness will restrict their lives, fettering their minds to a single world, a single life. If you think that your lifestyle is perfect, you will be too complacent to see ways it could be improved. Just as life always can get worse, it can also always get better!

I personally believe that if you do not strive to become a better person, if you are too satisfied with yourself, you will stop changing. This is natural: why would you want to change if you are perfect? But, if you don’t try to improve, it means you have essentially stuck in the state you were in. I think that your life freezes the moment you stop wanting to change. You may end up in a self-destructive stalemate while the rest of the world moves on around you. A very sad thought, I find.

I believe this can be avoided by approaching people with different ways of living and being open to what their lives can teach you about yours. Imagine meeting a highly religious family that spends three hours every day praying and meditating. If you laugh at them because that is a ridiculous waste of time, then it is very possible live a rather stressful life with little spare time to enjoy living it; maybe you should actually consider starting to meditate yourself to calm down and appreciate your life more!

If you reflect upon your own lifestyle and world view through the eyes of other people, and listen with open ears, you may even find that you enjoy the realisation that your life might not be as good as you thought it to be! I know from my own experience that there are many ways of discovering that my habits, morals or ideologies are lacking, and most are pretty unpleasant. For example, when someone I care about stops talking to me for something I have said or done without thinking; or when I loose a good job because I did not appreciate it enough to make efforts to keep it; or when I have too much fun playing with my friends, loose control and accidentally hurt someone. When things like these happen, I get a sort of shock wake-up and the suffocating guilt is what triggers me to try to make amends and make sure I never repeat the mistake.

If I could learn to avoid such disasters simply by being open to what other people can tell of their own experiences, and by being open to understanding how different people feel about and react to different things, I would gladly embrace this pain-free way of learning.

So, to put what I want to say with this post in a simple sentence: be open-minded for your own good!